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Catholic Weddings: Another Option
Contemporary
Catholics are often searching for a non-judgmental, sacramental
experience different from that offered by the institutional church. You
may want to have a Catholic wedding but may not be permitted, for
various reasons, by the institutional church. We at St Francis offer
you an alternative.
Those entering
into second marriages, those experiencing religious differences with
the church and others will find openness and acceptance with the WRB.
The White Robed Benedictines provide marriage services in a
compassionate manner. Perhaps you have concerns about perceived
barriers. We treat you with the same care Christ gave to all who came
to him. Are these of concern to you?
Outdoor Weddings and Other Sites
The
choice of location for your wedding is yours. Depending on weather and
other factors ceremonies may be held out-of-doors. While the WRB does
not maintain any church buildings we do have a church often available
for our use. You may also be able to use interdenominational churches
and chapels for more formal settings. Hotels, banquet halls, private
homes, museums and other locales are other options. A wedding
consultant or the yellow pages can yield additional suggestions.
Personalization of Wedding Ceremonies
We
will be pleased to assist you in personalizing your wedding ceremony.
There are many ways in which this can be accomplished. Options for
readings, both from the scriptures and other sources, which speak to
marriage are available. Vows can be written by you or chosen from more
traditional options. Ceremonies which speak to various ethnic groups
such as the coin, rope and veil, hand fasting or jumping-the-broom
ceremonies can also be accommodated. Unity candles, roses to parents
and other more traditional activities can be easily included.
Discussing your wishes with your priest is the best way to assure that
your day is special.
Nuptial Mass and Wedding Ceremonies
Your
wedding ceremony will be very similar to that celebrated in the Roman
jurisdiction since we share the same liturgical forms. The Nuptial Mass
is the preferred way of celebrating the sacrament. Because the WRB is
ecumenical, all people participating in the ceremony are invited to the
altar for communion, regardless of religious affiliation. On a
practical side, it only adds a minimal amount of time to the length of
the ceremony. Wedding ceremonies can also be celebrated outside of the
Mass.
Previous Marriages
As
Catholics, we believe in the sanctity of marriage; we also realize that
we are only too human. When a marriage ends through divorce, it is
often prima facie evidence that the essential element of marriage did
not exist to maintain the bond. While we do not have an annulment or
dispensation process, remarriage is allowed in order to avoid further
human tragedy. From this perspective the WRB solemnizes remarriages
with the joy and the peace of Christ.
Religious Differences
As
an ecumenical community, the WRB network is inclusive. We encourage you
to consider how religious differences might impact your relationship.
It is not one of those easily overlooked issues. We only ask that you
raise any children in a loving household and teach them to love God and
one another as He loves us, wholly and completely.
Marriage Preparation Classes
Your
marriage represents a change in how you see yourself and your
relationship with others. It is both exciting and frightening. You can
control only part of what happens to you. Your family and friends are
here to support you and so is the community as a whole. Marriage
(Pre-Cana) preparation courses and individual counseling can help. We
encourage you to take time to prepare yourselves and will assist you as
time and distance allow. Your marriage will work only if both of you
are committed to making it work. Ideally, the priest would like to meet
with you at least once before the ceremony.
Legal Issues
To
be legally married, you will need to have a license from the county
clerk or the state department of registration for the place in which
the ceremony will occur. Often, there is a short waiting period, a
definite expiration date and sometimes other requirements. After the
ceremony, the priest will make sure that your license is signed and
sent to the appropriate agency. He will also provide a marriage
certificate for your more immediate use. You will need to have this or
a document issued by the county clerk to change driver's licenses, bank
accounts, insurance plans and other legal documents after the wedding.
Recognition by the Roman Catholic Church
Each
jurisdiction has its own criteria for recognition of sacraments. The
White Robed Benedictine Network is not affiliated with the Roman
Catholic church. Through apostolic succession in the Old (Dutch)
Catholic tradition, we celebrate the same sacraments as those in the
Roman and Orthodox communities. Your marriage will be legal with the
state and a sacrament in the eyes of God.
Fees for WRB Wedding Services
There
is no per-se charge for our wedding services. A financial donation of
$350 is suggested, not mandatory. Becuase we do not have priests in
every state, a priest may be required to travel great distances to
celebrate the sacrament with you. We ask that those costs also be
covered separately from any donation. A donation check made payable to
the White Robed Benedictines may be considered tax deductible as the
IRS recognizes the WRB as a publicly supported (religious)
organization. Please check with your priest regarding this matter as we
do not deny the sacraments to anyone in financial distress.
What must I do to have a WRB priest officiate at our wedding?
The first step is to complete and submit a Marriage Petition.
This will allow us to find a priest closest to you and begin a dialogue
with you on your wedding. Ideally, we would like to personally meet at
least once with a couple. When this is not practical email and
telephone conversations may substitute. Your priest will work with you
to discuss marriage and help you plan your wedding.
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Sample Marriage Ceremonies, Rehearsal Information and
Ceremony Outlines
Outline of Catholic Marriage Ceremony Outside of Mass
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Outside of Mass
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Inside of Mass
Outline of Catholic Marriage Ceremony Inside of Mass
Sample Catholic Marriage Ceremony Inside of Mass (Spanish/English)
Sample Catholic/Orthodox Marriage Ceremony Outside of Mass
Rehearsal Outline Information
Sacraments
To learn more about all the sacraments, click on: Sacramental Life.
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